How many times have you hit your head on a too low door or been in the awkward position of being able to see people over the bathroom stall? Or what about getting whacked in the face by low hanging tree branches or had to deal with too short clothes? All the time, right? Simply put, the world is not made for us tall people. I don’t know about you but I’m sick of it!
I’m thinking about starting a revolution. I want to start a mass exodus to a country of our own. Tall people from all over the world will all live n peace and harmony in one place. We could call it Talltopia. It would be a place where all our dreams come true. A place where every house and building would have 9 foot ceilings so you can never hit your head.
There would be extra tall trees with no low hanging branches. All signs, decorations and anything you hang up would be set up at a minimum of 7 ft high so you won’t have to duck ever again.
When I was younger, I would wish that the ceiling on the school bus was higher. You don’t have to worry about that in Talltopia. We would be able to fit comfortably in any car, plane, bus and train. You won’t have to bend in half just to get on the train. Or fold yourself like origami on a plane.
It’s ridiculous how far we have to stoop down to sit down at these miniature dinner tables and desks that we are forced to deal with now. And don’t even get me started on toilets. Tables and chairs in Talltopia will be extra tall so we don’t have stoop down so low just to sit down, straining our knees and backs. Oh and legs hanging off the edge of your bed would be a thing of the past.
In Talltopia, you can walk into any store and find stylish clothes and shoes that fit. Basically everything in Talltopia would be made with tall people in mind. Tall refrigerators, mirrors, broom handles, stoves, counters; everything.
There would be no annoying short people asking you if you play basketball or how tall you are. And most of all, in Talltopia you wouldn’t have to worry about finding a tall mate. Nice, huh?
I have to mention that there is one rule. To go to Talltopia, women must be at least 5’10” and men must be at least 6’0″ no exceptions. You will be carded at the border.
I figure we can just take over a small country or city, (we can decide on which one later) it would be easy once we get enough people. With our collective height, we could just scare the present inhabitants away.
So who’s with me?